Saturday, August 22, 2009

This week's update.

My official weigh in this week is 182. That's up .5 lb since last week. Considering the 2 days before weigh-in, and the eating that I did while the hubby was in for a port call, I'm not going to balk too much at the result. The good news? On Tuesday this week, I saw something I haven't seen in a long time - the 170's. My weight was 179.5. It wasn't official, and could very well have been a fluke, but I know it can be done.

Now for a confession... I didn't count while he was here. Why do I do that? WHY? So now I'm out of the habit. I have to get back under control. As a result, I am feeling super depressed and looking to bad foods to make it better. Not really bad, mind you, but I guarantee I didn't need that bowl of Corn Pops last night before bed.

I'm feeling some depression creeping up on me. I have a lot of stress right now. With my hubby gone, it is so hard to deal with things. I have no sounding board. No support. NO break. I am "on" as Mommy 24 hours a day. I am touched out. I'm tired of being a waitress. Tired of being a butt wiper. I'm just TIRED. Like many people right now, money is tight. We're still trying to recover from the Disney trip. Okay, money's not just tight...It's much worse than that, but what can I do, except just hang in there for the next week and a half until payday? I'm also trying desperately to find a Medical Transcription job to take advantage of the education I've received.

Today is the second day that I've woken up grumpy. I am normally a good morning person, ready to help the kids wake up and get going with a smile. I am feeling so lonely, helpless, stressed, and frustrated today. I have to keep my diet in check. I need to be drinking water or tea when I get the boredom/stress hunger.

I've still got a ways to go before this patrol is over and my sweet man is home for a few weeks. I need to be at 178 when the patrol is finished to meet my goal and get a day at the salon. I need a hair cut SO badly. Time to keep my eyes on the prize.


The Roaming Bilderbacks said...

hugs, Amber... You're doing great! Seriously.. this pay period sucks.. I have no idea where our $$ went! I started back working out this week and have been eating pretty well, so I hope my scale will be nice to me on Monday!

Lyndsay said...

Amber love, Big hugs. I know exactly how you feel. I am in the exact same position right now. Gaining weight, hubby underway. Doing everything, broke till payday! You can bounce anything off me. Let me know if you'd like to talk. I'll give you my number. You are strong and courageous! Does making the soap bring you peace of mind? Big hugs, babe.
Love, Lyndsay

Zach and Beth said...

I pray you are able to find a job soon. I'm sorry times are so hard for you right now. I wish there was a way I could help you. You can accomplish your goals, Amber. You are one of the strongest women I know. I wish I could make you see that too. You are doing great, keep it up. You can get back on track, just keep your focus.

Chrissy said...

<3 I hope having your Sweet thang home for a surprise visit lifted your spirits and you are able to continue on the same successful road you've been going on. The road we all know you are destined to be on.

You know I'm always a quick text, buzz or phone call away.

Just a Girl in a Port said...

You can do it! :) love ya'!